undiagnosed: (pic#14468577)
pure of heart... dumb of ass... bi of sexual... ([personal profile] undiagnosed) wrote in [community profile] logsville2021-03-11 10:03 pm

it's just another day

Who: sterling archer (or randy randleman, rando calrissiano, Just Rando) and you!
When: throughout feb
Where: greene's, honeybees and a random street
What: Area Man Copes With Situation Poorly
Warnings: alcoholism, TBA



a. sterling archer, world's most dangerous... retail worker

[what was he going to do, join the SRPD and hope for a talent scout to pick him up for the FBI? yeah, no, that's hilarious. archer takes a good few months to actually accept he needs an income and-- even commit to lowering himself to one that isn't espionage. the odd jobs he takes around the place help fund his alcoholism and other frivolous spending but they were impermeant, which was the point. he's not going to be here long enough to need a job, he's going to find a way out or the others at the agency will come and get him, ray and pam. or even just him!

archer considers starting a PI firm - make the archer agency a reality, but then he'd have to go and have that conversation with the others and... ugh, no. too much effort.

he ends up in honeybees, practically walking into the sporting goods store and demanding a job, then being... really surprised when they just let him have it. he doesn't even mention his spy career! oh well. he knows about guns. he knows a lot about a lot of different kinds of weapons, actually, so he spends as much time as possible in the back and not interacting with the creepy santa rositans that mill in and out the store on a daily basis.

he's most likely to be caught upfront, rare as it is, unless you're one of his unfortunate coworkers, taking a colt commander to pieces to clean and reload, placing each part out methodically, and working with a careful hand anyone that doesn't know him well enough might be surprised he's capable of. if anyone approaches him they get a vague glare and:]
No. On lunch.

[there's no food, but there's an open bottle of whiskey sitting next to him.]

b. greene with envy

[archer has been standing next to his shopping cart in greene's canned food aisle, staring at an off-brand can of spam-like he can see through the thin metal for a solid five minutes now.

he hates buying his own food. his own clothes. working in a place that isn't a spy agency. he'd been doing more of the former at home after aleistar had forced archer to kill him, but he's not getting any better at it. the cart's full of mostly alcohol and a mish-mash of vegetables and some expensive steak cuts, things that would be hard to make a proper meal out of. there's a large rottweiler with an obnoxious "service dog" vest on it standing at his feet, sniffing the air occasionally.

not that anyone's judging. or cares. sometimes you just gotta throw what you feel like buying into the trolley and then see what you can do with it, you know?

he tosses the can into the cart with a heavy sigh, watching with a dead, stony expression as the metal edge hits the neck of a bottle of scotch and shatters it. the amber liquid pours out all over his haul and drips through the bars and onto the linoleum floor.

no matter who saw this, archer is not shy about turning on his heel and walking away. god, he's so fucking tired. his dog follows after tilting his head, uncomprehending of the pungent smell that just filled the aisle.

not today, satan.]


c. a skipping record

[he sees the doppelgangers again. he keeps seeing them around, ones that look like ray (who archer, despite all his efforts, can't find anymore, and it leaves a terrible pit in his stomach he doesn't really understand), ones that look like lana, ones that look like his mother. archer can't even tell it's actually a double of them or he's just seeing what he wants to. archer's hallucinations haven't really been troubling him, but seeing these things around? they fizz out and get replaced with familiar threats, then fizz again and he's left not knowing what he's even looking at until one of them almost stabs him again.

though... honestly? he doesn't really want to see his mother right now. he wants to see aj but isn't sure what he'd do if he actually did see her here. he wants--

archer doesn't know what he wants. that's... relatively new.

he can be found standing where the doppelganger he almost managed to catch disappeared into nothing, holding his hand out where the static rip had been.

anyone that gets close, he pulls his gun on them immediately, reflexes clearly well-honed despite his alcoholic demeanor.]


Who did you see? [he asks, eyes narrowed.]

wildcard

[you know what to do! please pm this journal or hit me up at [plurk.com profile] jabbers if you want a starter!]
ourworldnow: (pic#14576122)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-03-15 01:57 am (UTC)(link)
There was- they-

[Louis waved his hands over his hair, as if he were about to explain the hair cut- then over his shirt, like he was about to explain clothes-

The just dropped his hands and frowned.]


Okay, don't shoot me. But I have no idea what they looked like.
ourworldnow: (pic#14576123)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-03-21 02:48 am (UTC)(link)
My brains are still fresh and delicious, thank you. Clearly there's a witch or men in black around.

[Will Smith Men in Black? You bet your ass. But now that the gun isn't pointed at him, Louis seems to have moved very smoothly passed that whole threat. Like that's just a thing that happens sometimes in normal society.]
ourworldnow: (Default)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-03-21 09:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, man, you're probably a little crazy. If anyone here is totally sane, they are deeply, deeply broken inside. But we're just products of our crazy times.

[Said with the sage wisdom and absolute confidence that only an 18 year old can have.]

Nothing we can do about it, right?
ourworldnow: (Default)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-03-22 07:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Look, let's me a deal: you don't turn me in, I don't tell anyone you're wandering the streets pointing guns at innocent truants.

[He's got a smile, he's raising his eyebrows, really leaning in with the whole charm he's convinced he's got, but always made his friends back home roll their eyes.]

Also I'm fresh from a school for delinquent youth. Hearing about terrible parents is my specialty, if that sweetens the deal. Just don't tell me you're another chronic masturbation case. I already know too much about too many in that category.
ourworldnow: (pic#14576123)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-03-29 06:09 pm (UTC)(link)
More or less. The last one ran for her life. Literally.

[From the walking dead, but it's funnier if it sounds like it was just from kids, right? Right. It makes him grin anyway.]

I'm Louis, in charge of team moral and musical accompaniment.

[Now is the time to offer his hand to shake, clearly.]
ourworldnow: (Default)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-03-31 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[If Archer thinks he's just going to take the fail and retract his hand, he is so very wrong. It lingers there. Like a clingy ex, waiting to be noticed.]

You wound me. Moral is the single most important part of a team. If everyone's too miserable to get out of bed, what's the point?
ourworldnow: (pic#14576128)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-04-06 05:45 am (UTC)(link)
[The hand starts to wiggle. This is now a battle of the Big Baby Wills, Archer.]

That depends on who I'm playing for.
ourworldnow: (Default)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-04-08 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
Wow, you're shorter than I thought, Mr. Washington.

[Why fight it? He'll just grin and, after a moment, try to awkwardly pat 'George's' arm so that his hand can finally fall.]

And surprise a fan of Mr. Loggins. The educational system failing me once again.
ourworldnow: (Default)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-04-08 07:37 pm (UTC)(link)
That you hate your name? It's okay, man. I knew a kid named Dewey. As in ''Do we' wanna wedgie?' How embarrassing is that?

[And positive reactions? To his music? It's his new best friend.]

I'll have to try and remember it all, but, oh yeah. I can play anything.
ourworldnow: (pic#14576128)

[personal profile] ourworldnow 2021-04-08 07:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, hating you name is why you're not tell me it, understood, Georgie.

[From now own, that is Archer's name. His chosen name. Be strong, man.]

And the tune?